Big Lights, Big City: Two, Spots and Ho's

Mark pissed himself in the airport before we even got on the plane. Sort of. We had just gotten coffee and naturally I was wearing a light-colored shirt and spilled on it, just two small drops. I handed Mark my coffee and ran to the bathroom to wash it out. When I came back, he was sitting down, casually slumped in a chair, cup of coffee in each hand, calm expression on his face. As I got closer I saw a drop of coffee fall from one of the cups. Evidently not the first drop. Watching it, my eyes fell to a big puddle on the crotch of his jeans. I thought at first he was being silent, preparing me for some kind of "Look what happened when you ran to the bathroom to get a couple of microscopic dots off your shirt!" However, he didn’t know and sat there looking like a kid who pissed himself and didn't know. I couldn’t stop laughing. Afterward we saw other people with coffee stains. Peet’s Coffee needs new cups, like a girl with new implants.

The airline didn’t offer a snack until the ride was almost over. They did, however, offer very overpriced food from their air-café menu. Fuck that, I said, I’ll let my stomach growl and suffer. Didn’t we pay much money to ride on the plane? Yes, we did. I’ve flown across the country before and gotten a meal, or at least a couple of snacks. Back in the day, before I flew, nice meals were served. We were like prisoners on that plane in this day, starving till the end.

Ah, the sound of relentless orgasm. The Ho's were sitting behind us on the flight to Vegas. I know this because the stewardess gave a shoutout to them over the intercom before the plane took off. At one point Mark and I were engaging in conversation, when from the seat behind us came a high-pitched exhale sounding much like that which accompanies an orgasm. It was loud. Both of us instantly lost memory of what we’d been talking about. Could have been the Sound of Pleasure caused it, could have been the Pain of Starvation.