BATHROBE
Recently bathrobe discussions have been lacing the airways. What the hell good is a robe? Why does someone need a robe? Who wears robes?
My mom bought me a robe this past Christmas and I wondered these things, which again arose during a brief K-S conference in the haunted mansion. My mom had bought me a robe years earlier and I had to struggle to use it. I had to plan to use that big green thing just wanting to serve purpose in the world. And I was failing.
My grandma always wore a robe after her bath at night. She had all sorts of robes: silky ones, thick cotton ones, terry cloth. I remember bright red.
I shower, I get dressed, I get on with my day or night. There isn’t time or purpose for a robe.
This equation, however, seems too simply exclusive. There must be a stress-free way to include the robe in my lifestyle.
I have visions of fanfare and decadence associated with the robe. The robe fascinates me, so I did some research.
First, a definition: A loose-fitting robe worn before and after bathing and for lounging. Included in this definition is timeframe and purpose.
Learn by example. Here are recorded instances of people wearing bathrobes:
Robert Moses: "He'd phone ahead, throw a bathrobe over his swim trunks, hop into his big black chauffeured limousine with the ‘NY 2000’ plate, and be delivered within five minutes to the waterfront home of old friends Rogers and Mary Howell, who lived on the same creek but a half-mile away, where the water was cleaner."
Thomas Clarence Larson: "A bathrobe presented him by Frank Gotch, onetime wrestling champion of the world, is a prized possession of T. C. Larson, 1913 South College street."
Archimedes: "The word ‘eureka,’ which means ‘I have found it!,’ was allegedly first uttered by the philosopher and mathematician Archimedes, who figured out the solution to a vexing scientific problem while in the bath and was so thrilled that he ran into the street shouting about it, sans bathrobe."
J. Anthony Lukas: "He returned in the afternoon to his Upper West Side apartment and hanged himself with a bathrobe sash."
Art: "The Oberlin work is an early example of Dine's use of the bathrobe (always empty, volumetric, with hands on hips) as a ‘friendly signifier’ of common, vernacular use and personal possession." Dine stated, "I probably visualized the axe, the log, and the bathrobe as an extension of myself--a self portrait."
Archaeology: "Bathrobe and shower clogs , Small mirror, Cloth line and clothespins…Liquid detergent in a plastic bottle, Flashlight, Small canteen: We provide water in the field, but you might find a small canteen useful, especially on weekends." These things are listed as needed for an excavation expedition.
What can be deduced about the robe from these instances?
-The robe is an acceptable cover if you need to cross town for a swim, so that you might transport yourself to the swimming venue, already dressed in your swimming gear. No need to change clothes. The robe is efficient.
-The robe is not a practical piece but a souvenir, a memento.
-The robe represents grounded presence of mind—too grounded, in that a mind concerned about such banalities as putting on the robe to cover oneself might not be loose enough to happen upon a great discovery. Sometimes we must make choices.
-If we suffer from crippling depression, we might want to remove the sash immediately from the robe and burn it. Then, however, the robe will hang open, defying its purpose, in which case we might not be a good candidate for a robe.
-The robe can be used to make artistic statement. Get in touch with yourself; draw a robe and flank it with pieces of your psyche.
-Apparently, if you are an archaeologist, either amateur or professional, a bathrobe is a necessity. You could throw on a pair of shorts and/or a big t-shirt, but that would not be the same. The robe must somehow prepare the digger for what is about to be dug.
Duly noted, in my quick research I found many more instances of men wearing robes than women. Furthermore, the first site I found containing information about a woman in a robe mentioned pubes. For reasons cited as 'obscenity' I was not allowed access to this site.
I have been unable to find a solid history of the robe—I work, after all. However, Wikipedia confirms that the bathrobe is worn in instances where one does not need or want to dress immediately and can remain in the nude yet keep warm during this time. In this respect, the robe is sexy.
Comedian Jim Gaffigan adroitly points out that when we see people wearing bathrobes outdoors we think they are crazy. They stumble outside in the early morn, fumble round for the newspaper. They look displaced yet cushioned in both mind and body.
The robe: decadence indoors, lunacy outdoors. When I make use of the bathrobe, I will have made inner peace.
My mom bought me a robe this past Christmas and I wondered these things, which again arose during a brief K-S conference in the haunted mansion. My mom had bought me a robe years earlier and I had to struggle to use it. I had to plan to use that big green thing just wanting to serve purpose in the world. And I was failing.
My grandma always wore a robe after her bath at night. She had all sorts of robes: silky ones, thick cotton ones, terry cloth. I remember bright red.
I shower, I get dressed, I get on with my day or night. There isn’t time or purpose for a robe.
This equation, however, seems too simply exclusive. There must be a stress-free way to include the robe in my lifestyle.
I have visions of fanfare and decadence associated with the robe. The robe fascinates me, so I did some research.
First, a definition: A loose-fitting robe worn before and after bathing and for lounging. Included in this definition is timeframe and purpose.
Learn by example. Here are recorded instances of people wearing bathrobes:
Robert Moses: "He'd phone ahead, throw a bathrobe over his swim trunks, hop into his big black chauffeured limousine with the ‘NY 2000’ plate, and be delivered within five minutes to the waterfront home of old friends Rogers and Mary Howell, who lived on the same creek but a half-mile away, where the water was cleaner."
Thomas Clarence Larson: "A bathrobe presented him by Frank Gotch, onetime wrestling champion of the world, is a prized possession of T. C. Larson, 1913 South College street."
Archimedes: "The word ‘eureka,’ which means ‘I have found it!,’ was allegedly first uttered by the philosopher and mathematician Archimedes, who figured out the solution to a vexing scientific problem while in the bath and was so thrilled that he ran into the street shouting about it, sans bathrobe."
J. Anthony Lukas: "He returned in the afternoon to his Upper West Side apartment and hanged himself with a bathrobe sash."
Art: "The Oberlin work is an early example of Dine's use of the bathrobe (always empty, volumetric, with hands on hips) as a ‘friendly signifier’ of common, vernacular use and personal possession." Dine stated, "I probably visualized the axe, the log, and the bathrobe as an extension of myself--a self portrait."
Archaeology: "Bathrobe and shower clogs , Small mirror, Cloth line and clothespins…Liquid detergent in a plastic bottle, Flashlight, Small canteen: We provide water in the field, but you might find a small canteen useful, especially on weekends." These things are listed as needed for an excavation expedition.
What can be deduced about the robe from these instances?
-The robe is an acceptable cover if you need to cross town for a swim, so that you might transport yourself to the swimming venue, already dressed in your swimming gear. No need to change clothes. The robe is efficient.
-The robe is not a practical piece but a souvenir, a memento.
-The robe represents grounded presence of mind—too grounded, in that a mind concerned about such banalities as putting on the robe to cover oneself might not be loose enough to happen upon a great discovery. Sometimes we must make choices.
-If we suffer from crippling depression, we might want to remove the sash immediately from the robe and burn it. Then, however, the robe will hang open, defying its purpose, in which case we might not be a good candidate for a robe.
-The robe can be used to make artistic statement. Get in touch with yourself; draw a robe and flank it with pieces of your psyche.
-Apparently, if you are an archaeologist, either amateur or professional, a bathrobe is a necessity. You could throw on a pair of shorts and/or a big t-shirt, but that would not be the same. The robe must somehow prepare the digger for what is about to be dug.
Duly noted, in my quick research I found many more instances of men wearing robes than women. Furthermore, the first site I found containing information about a woman in a robe mentioned pubes. For reasons cited as 'obscenity' I was not allowed access to this site.
I have been unable to find a solid history of the robe—I work, after all. However, Wikipedia confirms that the bathrobe is worn in instances where one does not need or want to dress immediately and can remain in the nude yet keep warm during this time. In this respect, the robe is sexy.
Comedian Jim Gaffigan adroitly points out that when we see people wearing bathrobes outdoors we think they are crazy. They stumble outside in the early morn, fumble round for the newspaper. They look displaced yet cushioned in both mind and body.
The robe: decadence indoors, lunacy outdoors. When I make use of the bathrobe, I will have made inner peace.
9 Comments:
robes are good for when you're in the shower and someone rings the doorbell. of if you have houseguests you don't want to be nude in front of and you need to step out of the bathroom to get clothes. or if you are cold in your pajamas and are too lazy to shower and dress in real clothes. or if you are with a suitor and say "i'm going to clip into something more comfortable" you can put on a robe and smoke a cigar. i hope that helps
thanks, kim. i figured i'd run people off with such a behemoth post about bathrobes. i will try the cigar thing with my suitor.
i appreciate the "behemoth post" about robes. they feel as if they are an artifact of my parent's generation, along with pajamas; then again, robert moses could do whatever the heck he pleased. i happen to think robes are awesome, though when wearing one on the weekend, my productivity drops to zero.
I use a robe that I got for Christmas, and I love it -- a big terrycloth deal. I like to lounge around in it rather than getting dressed, or before bed but when I don't feel like wearing clothes anymore. I also have slippers now. I'd say I'm becoming my mother but she tends to lounge in the nude ...
hi bookfraud--thanks. i too am fond of the bathrobe. i've just never been able to fit it into my life. i'd like to. what a costume.
frog princess--i keep hearing of mothers who lounge in the nude. is it just that people choose to tell this to me in particular, or is it common?
finnegan, how could i have not thought of this? you make expert use of the bathrobe.
Sara, up until my brother was about 10 she never wore clothing at home, but she's tending to nowadays (he's 16 now). I grew up thinking that all moms hung out at home naked. They don't?
frog, my mom didn't hang out naked, but she hasn't been shy either; i.e., she has to remember enough clothing when certain people are around. interesting...maybe it IS more common than I thought for moms to nude or half-nude.
my mom is as anti mude as they come. she wont even change clothes in her bedroom, has to be in a locked bathroom. and she wears pantyhose with everything, even when we went to seasme street and she wore a swimsuit under her clothes
holy shit, kim. i knew about the pantyhose but not about the rest. i don't know what the prize is for, but you win.
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